We assume that families will simply “step in” as parents grow older, partners become ill, or neighbours need help. And so caring begins quietly: a quick visit here, a bit of shopping there. But what starts as small things often swells into a near full-time responsibility.

And crucially, many would never dream of calling themselves “carers” at all. They’re family. They’re friends. They’re neighbours. They’re simply doing what people do for one another. Until it becomes too much.

An invisible workforce stretched too thin

The reality is that thousands of people are juggling the impossible—supporting ageing parents while raising children, working jobs, or managing their own health. And for the organisations trying to help them? Funding is inconsistent, limited, and full of strings.

Even when support exists, it can be difficult for carers to access. Yes, local groups may offer training, advice, counselling, or wellbeing activities, but these offerings often assume carers have hours to spare to attend sessions or take advantage of services when in reality, they’re lucky to have minutes. Finding affordable cover which suits both the carer and cared for is another minefield.

There is one thing carers consistently want: time. Time to have a break, to meet up with friends, go to the gym, get a haircut, to study or work.

And the way to give carers time is to provide respite care for the person they support. Yet even here, carer breaks are not defined in legislation, and with council budgets squeezed further year on year, accessing the support they need becomes yet another battle. 

The Care Act: Support in theory, not always in practice

The Care Act 2014 was supposed to bring clarity and fairness by creating a national eligibility threshold. In theory, this means carers can be recognised regardless of the needs of the person they care for, and support is based on how caring impacts their own wellbeing.

But there’s a catch. To be eligible, carers must show that caring affects their physical or mental health—or prevents them from achieving essential outcomes such as maintaining relationships, sustaining employment, managing nutrition, or keeping a habitable home environment. These are extraordinarily difficult things to “measure,” and the reality is that many carers simply keep pushing through exhaustion rather than risk being told they’re “managing fine.”

And even if they do qualify, they may need to go through financial assessments before the offer of support— which could also lead to carers being asked to pay for the help they need to keep themselves from collapsing. 

Charities filling the gaps—where they can

Charities step in with what could generously be called a patchwork of services, using the funding they get to support carers in the ways they can – support groups, information and advice, training, or trips out. 

But even these lifelines rely on fragile funding landscapes and short-term grants.

Photo by Dominik Lange on Unsplash